Episode 32

The Mutual Broadcasting System brings you another episode of Life in Hyperion.

Today's episode: "The Melting of The Iceberg", Part 7

Yesterday, Conrad, Cy, Phil, and Joanne made their way to the house that Conrad share with sister Darlene for her 30th birthday party.  However, things get off on the wrong foot when Darlene foils the efforts of the party-goers to hide.  As we begin, Cy has been trading barbs with Darlene, their usual way of speaking...

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"You two, for once, can you put aside the arguements?" asks Conrad.
"I guess so, if Darlene will." says Cy.
"I promise, my brother." says Darlene.
"She hasn't referred to her brother by his name in 15 years." whispers Cy to Joanne.
"He knows who he is." says Darlene.
"I wouldn't hurt to refer to your sibling by the name his parents gave him." says Cy.
"Is that the same with you, Cyrus McLean Scott?" asks Darlene.
"I was named after two great people in my mother's life." says Cy.
"Guys, let's stop the fight now." says Conrad.
"Okay, my brother." says Darlene.
"Right-o, Conrad." says Cy.
"So, Darlene, how old are you?" asks Phil.
"I am 30 years of age as of this day." says Darlene coldly.
"I turned 21 myself only three months ago and I still feel like a different person. I still remember taking my first sip of beer." says Phil.
"Bought for you by Cyrus, no doubt." says Darlene.
"There's another reason I don't like her. She always calls me Cyrus." says Cy.
"But that is your name." says Darlene.
"I prefer Cy. It's what my mother called me." says Cy.
"Darlene, it's so nice to finally meet you." says Joanne.
"And who are you?" asks Darlene.
"I'm Joanne Shulman. I'm Cy's girlfriend." says Joanne.
"I didn't realize Cyrus was in any kind of a relationship." says Darlene.
"I can get myself a girlfriend once in a while." says Cy.
"The way I see it, Cyrus, I still can't believe any right-thinking woman would have anything to do with you." says Darlene.
"Are you saying my girlfriend's a loony?" asks Cy.
"I believe so, Cyrus, but not in those words." says Darlene.
"She is cold, Cy." says Joanne.
"I warned you, didn't I?" says Cy.
"What's wrong with what I said?" asks Darlene.
"I can't believe that you would even asked that question. You actually believe that I should go through life alone." says Cy.
"Not alone, Cyrus. Just that you should shape up so you can settle down with someone." says Darlene.
"My mother didn't want to settle down until she was 40 and I can wait the same." says Cy.
"Who cares what your mother did?" asks Darlene.
"Darlene, you are the coldest thing on this planet. If Al Gore looked at you, he'd stopped talking about global warming because it doesn't work on you." says Cy.
"Is that so, Cyrus?" asks Darlene.
"My name is Cy and I would like you to call me that." says Cy.
"I see you brought your usual gift again." says Darlene, pointing to the bottle of whiskey in his hand.
"This is the fifth bottle I've gotten you, in the hopes that you drink this and it would melt the ice." says Cy.
"I'll never drink." says Darlene.
"That's what you keep saying and I keep hoping it doesn't come true." says Cy.
"Why do keep holding on to such an idea?" asks Darlene.
"Because I believe that there's a warm human being hidden under all of that ice and if something would melt that ice, maybe you'd actually have friends." says Cy.
"Cyrus, you are a dreamer, just like your mother." says Darlene.
"She was not a dreamer and neither am I." says Cy.
"Really, Cyrus?" asks Darlene.
"I know I'm not a dreamer." says Cy.
"Even with such a silly idea as giving me a bottle of whiskey every single birthday?" says Darlene.
"You think it's such a silly idea, why don't you do something about it?" asks Cy.
"Like what, Cyrus?" asks Darlene.
"Drink the whiskey." says Cy.
"You want me to get drunk just to prove your point?" asks Darlene.
"Why not? You have nothing to lose." says Cy.
"If you think so, then I will drink it." says Darlene, who then unscrews the top off the bottle.
"Drink it." says Cy.
"You don't have to do this, sis." says Conrad.
"I must, my brother, if only to prove Cyrus wrong." says Darlene.
Darlene then puts the bottle to her lips and starts drinking down the whiskey. As the party guests look on, Darlene, in a few short minutes, manages to down the whole bottle, leaving nothing left as she removes the bottle from her lips and puts it down on a table.
"Well, Darlene?" asks Cy.
"There, I drank it all down... " says Darlene before she drops to the floor.
"Darlene!" shouts Conrad.
"Calm down, Conrad." says Cy.
"Calm down? You've just killed my sister!" says Conrad.
"Let me check." says Joanne, who then checks for Darlene's pulse.
"Well, Joanne?" asks Conrad.
"She's still alive." says Joanne.
"So, she must be in a coma." says Conrad.
"You don't know what's going on." says Cy.
"Oh, yes I do. You've done something to my sister." says Conrad.
"She's still alive, Conrad, so there's no need to panic." says Cy.
"What if that whiskey has put her in a coma? She'll never regain consciousness." says Conrad.
"You're worrying your head off over nothing." says Cy.
"And you're not doing anything to help her." says Conrad.
"What do you do when someone downs a whole bottle of whiskey and then passes out?" asks Cy.
"Call a doctor." says Conrad.
"Conrad, you're overrecting." says Cy.
"And you're underreacting." says Conrad.
"Conrad, I've had enough of this." says Cy.
"And I've had enough of your atittude towards my sister." says Conrad, who then storms his way towards and up the stairs.

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Tomorrow, the party-goers go their separate ways, Cy and Joanne perform guard duty over Darlene, and a strange occurrence enters the scene.

Join us, won't you?
Yours truly, John Maxwell.

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